


Sick Thoughts

by indecisivebehaviors



Series: lawrusso one-shots [1]
Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Hate Sex, I have no idea where it came from, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Song fic, listen imma be real i wrote this in an hour, there is no beta, this probably sucks and i dont know why im posting this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 08:21:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29486709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indecisivebehaviors/pseuds/indecisivebehaviors
Summary: The first time it happens, he blames it on the alcohol.==Song fic loosely based on the song Sick Thoughts by Lewis  Blisset
Relationships: Daniel LaRusso/Johnny Lawrence
Series: lawrusso one-shots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2179641
Comments: 32
Kudos: 78





	Sick Thoughts

_We might just be unkind_

_But that's just how we're designed_

_You got me so fucked up_

_Think about you most of the time_

_Then I think about losing my mind_

_I wanna stop before we're caught_

_But don't stop_

_Don't stop_

_Don't stop_

_And I got things that I want_

_But you're on top_

_On top_

_On top_

The first time it happens, he blames it on the alcohol.

He’d just wanted to get drunk and not think about Johnny Lawrence. He’d consumed most of his thoughts the last several weeks, and it showed in the tense line of his shoulders and the almost permanent scowl on his face. Amanda had even started to notice, sending him home early with a glare _you’re going to scare away customers if you keep acting like this_ and of course that’s what mattered. He was fucking up their business, _his_ business and it was all because of Johnny fucking Lawrence. There’s an itch at the back of his skull and all he wants is to get it to _stop._  
Seeing Johnny at the bar had been an accident. But the blonde had seen him, before Daniel had seen _him_ and he was far too pissed off to back away from a challenge so he sat down at the bar next to him and soon they’re arguing again like they always do, and they’re both chugging down liquor like its air. They’re kicked out at a quarter to one, when the bartender threatens to call the cops. The itch is still there.

He doesn’t remember how he ended up at Johnny’s apartment. They’re still arguing and he’s following him in and slamming his door shut and he doesn’t have time to register the movement before Johnny slams him up against the wall. They’re both breathing hard, panting in the small space between them and he doesn’t know who leans in first but then it’s all teeth and tongues and he feels the itch start to fade.

A leg is shoved roughly between his own and Johnny’s swallowing his moans when he feels the first rough drag of his hard cock over his own. He doesn’t remember moving but he’s gripping tight and tugging at the hair on the back of his neck and he feels his cock throb at the sound it drags out of the man’s throat. His only protest is a sharp bite to his lip when he feels Johnny wrap both of his legs around his waist and he’s being carried down the dark hallway. He’s shoved hard into the wall several times on the way to his bed and he’s groaning loud in the quiet of the apartment when he feels teeth latch onto his neck. He can already feel the bruises on his hips he knows he’ll have for days.

He’s dropped on the bed and he doesn’t stop him when Johnny starts to undress him. His shirts untucked and unbuttoned, several of the buttons somewhere on the floor now, pants and boxers around one ankle, and the asshole has only tossed his jacket to floor, unbuttoning his own shirt and pulling down his jeans just enough and he’s throwing his head back, not caring how loud he is, when teeth bite down hard against his pulse and he feels Johnny pressed against him and it’s dry, the friction just this side of _too much_ and it’s so good it almost ends right there. He practically whines when he feels the man move off of him, hears him groan low in his throat, and then he’s banging around in drawers and tossing something on the bed next to his head.

And then Johnny’s leaning over him now, not quite touching him, staring directly into his eyes. It’s the first moment of clarity he’s had all day, looking back at brilliant blue and for the first time he thinks about what he’s doing, and this is wrong, so wrong, he should go home, back to Amanda and-

But Johnny’s moving to get off of him and he doesn’t want that so he yanks him back down, kiss sloppy and uncoordinated and it leaves him feeling dizzy.

“Don’t stop.”

_We're psychos forever_

_In diamonds and leather_

_We'll never get better_

_That's why I got these_

Johnny’s wearing that stupid fucking leather jacket and he’s still wearing his wedding ring the next time it happens. He can’t blame the alcohol this time.

It’s been weeks and the itch is back and he’s angry at just about everything these days. Amanda is giving him the silent treatment, pissed off at him for something he can’t even remember because he _can’t think_ anymore, because all he can ever think about is _him_. He’s laying on the couch and it’s a quarter to one and he doesn’t know what compels him to quietly make his way through the house, grabbing his keys and shutting the door behind him. He doesn’t look back even once. He drives almost on autopilot to Johnny’s apartment, wants to pick a fight, wants to argue, wants to occupy the man’s head as much as he occupies his own.

As it turns out, he doesn’t need to. He opens the door after the second knock, still dressed like he just got back from the bar, takes one look at him before he’s being dragged into the apartment and he barely hears the click of the lock before he’s tasting cheap beer and cigarettes on his tongue and all he can think about are the hands leaving bruises in the shape of fingertips on his skin, all he can do is wrap his legs around his waist and dig his own hands into his shoulders dragging out moans that he swallows down his own throat.

Johnny’s still wearing the jacket and Daniel’s still wearing his ring when he sinks down with a broken moan. It hurts, knows he’ll be sore for days, but he wants it to hurt, wants the burn to chase away the itch in his head.

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts_

_Look what you've caused_

_You've got 'em too_

_Wanna know what's makin' you numb_

_Beautiful when the damage is done_

_You know me, I won't budge_

_I'm about to start taking what's mine_

_Then I'll think about losing my mind_

Soon it becomes a habit. Anytime he starts to feel the itch forming at the back of his skull, he finds himself, always at a quarter to one, when he knows everyone is asleep, driving to see Johnny. Sometimes they meet at bars, get absolutely wasted before they go back to his place, and sometimes Daniel will just show up at his door in the middle of the night. It’s always rough and frantic, tearing clothes, breaking skin, and he feels the ache for days and it’s so good and the itch goes away for a while. But it always returns, and so does he.

And tonight is no different. They’re laying there in the haze of the aftermath. Johnny never kicks him out, and Daniel never leaves, not until the sun rises. But they don’t talk after and they definitely don’t touch. Normally Johnny is out like a light after, only barely conscious enough to throw a rag in his general direction before he collapses back on the bed. Daniel doesn’t always sleep when he’s here. After a very heavy night of drinking, sure, but on the days when he comes and there’s no liquor involved, he’ll normally just stare at the ceiling and enjoy the quiet that finally settles over his mind. He always pays for it later, groggy and delirious at the dealership, but he’s careful to avoid the angry stares of his wife on those mornings and he’s fine.

But today, Johnny doesn’t sleep and neither does he. Instead, he feels eyes burning into the side of his head and when he turns to meet them, bright even in the low light of the room, he knows something has changed.

He doesn’t know who moves first. Johnny meets him in the middle, and the kiss is nothing like they’ve shared before. It’s slow and soft, no bitter taste of copper on his tongue. Johnny pulls him by the waist and it’s gentle, hands barely brushing over the dark purple marks he knows were left there earlier. Daniel comes easily into his hold, one arm holding himself up by Johnny’s head, and his other hand cupping the side of his jaw.

They stay like that for a long time, exchanging slow, languid kisses there in the dark, Daniel tries to pretend that this is normal. That these are the kisses he wakes up to in the morning, the ones he gets before he falls asleep. He imagines the taste of burnt coffee instead of cheap beer. Imagines a different ring and a different house and a different life.

When Johnny pulls back his eyes are wet and there are tears pricking at the back of his own eyes and he almost lets them fall, closing his eyes when he feels him gently brush the hair from his forehead and sweep a thumb lightly over his jaw. He doesn’t fight him when Johnny pulls him down to his chest, arms wrapping around his waist, just settles with an arm over his chest and his head resting where he can hear his heartbeat.

When he wakes up in the morning, Johnny kisses him and Daniel tries not to think about how much it tastes like _home._

_I wanna stop before we're caught_

_But don't stop_

_Don't stop_

_Don't stop_

_And I got things that I want_

_But you're on top_

_On top_

_On top_

_We're psychos forever_

_In diamonds and leather_

_We'll never get surrender_

_That's why I got these_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts (sick thoughts)_

_Look what you've caused (you caused)_

_You treat me rough (me rough)_

_You've got 'em too_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts (sick thoughts)_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts (sick thoughts)_

_Look what you've caused (you caused)_

_You've got 'em too_

_Hour after midnight_

_Think about you_

_Don't know how it started_

_Always bleeds through_

_Feel you runnin' on my mind_

_Creepin' up and down my spine_

_No one thinks like you and I, I_

It’s a quarter til one when the dam finally breaks. It’s been weeks since he’d last gone to see him. He’s lying there with the itch in his head and the ache in his chest when he can’t take it anymore. All he can think about now are calloused fingers and hard lines and brilliant blue eyes. His stomach twists and he wants, _needs_ to see him _now_ .  
He’s out of bed before he can think twice about it, hears Amanda stir beside him when he shoves the covers off, but he’s throwing on his clothes and grabbing his shoes before she can ask him any questions.

His mind is chanting at him _you need to see him see him go go go_ and so he does.

When he walks down the driveway, keys in hand, he isn’t really surprised to see Johnny’s car parked out front, the engine still running. He locks eyes with him under the glare of the streetlamp and doesn’t even think twice about getting in the passenger seat. He’s grabbing him by the collar before the door even shuts and Johnny meets him halfway. It’s a kiss in name only, desperate and wanting, more teeth than tongue and he can taste copper in his mouth when bites down hard on his lip. A hand is gripping his thigh, tight enough that he’s sure there’ll be a hand shaped bruise in the morning and it _hurts_ , but he’s got his hands fisted in the hair at the back of and he revels in the sounds he makes when he _pulls_. And then it’s slow and soft and Daniel almost cries when the hand releases its grip and he feels the first hesitant, gentle touch to the side of his face, and he pulls back, just enough to breathe against his lips, his mind finally blissfully quiet, 

“Drive.”

_'Cause I got these s-i-c-k thoughts, you got 'em_

_Look at me, look what you started_

_I'm so sick and broken-hearted, hearted_

_Cause we got these s-i-c-k thoughts, we want 'em_

_Look at us, look what we started_

_I'm so sick and broken hearted_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts (sick thoughts)_

_Look what you've caused (you caused)_

_You treat me rough (me rough)_

_You've got 'em too_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts (sick thoughts)_

_Sick thoughts, sick thoughts (sick thoughts)_

_Look what you've caused (you caused)_

_You've got 'em too_

_Sick thoughts_

**Author's Note:**

> fuck this probably sucks so bad XD  
> (for the record this has nothing to do with any of my pre-existing works; I don't know what compelled me to write this let alone post it)


End file.
